My keyboard has been drinking again

and it's forcing me to post about boring random things no one could care about.

First, my dog is the best dog ever. I like dogs and have had many, but she is different. She has a better vocabulary than most of the replicants I encounter on a day to day basis, and if I mention cookies or about 15 other food related words her eyes bug out and she gets a rictus grin on her face.

She also practices cute looks in the mirror and comes up with little games to amuse me and anyone who comes over. You can tell when she is trying to be cute because she will look at you out of the corner of her eye to see how well it's going over. She also waves her hands at you to get attention at times, and when she is sleepy she will do it lying down where she barely moves at all.

She's too proud to beg, but if I am eating something she wants, she will go to her food bowl and take out one little piece and come eat it next to me, making sure I see her eat it and demonstrating how hungry she is. It never fails to make me chuckle.

She is a bit vain and jealous, though. She will stand next to the other pups on the couch and do a hip move that looks like it comes right out of a 40s movie starring some vampy seductress which knocks them off the couch so she will be the only one getting attention. When I gave her a terrible haircut one time, she sat in front of the mirror staring at herself in horror for about 3 days and wouldn't eat. Once in a while if I give the other dogs too much attention she will hit them in the face with her paws, too. She can also be very pouty and she was mad at me and wouldn't look at me for 3 days after the dog attack even though she would still go nuts for other people, but it's all in a very cute way.

Second, I finally solved my wireless internet problems. Sort of. That is, I ripped out my wireless card and threw it out, and I got a big ass 100 foot cable to my router. I know I facetiously challenged google to a fight to the death a while ago, but if I ever go to taiwan!!! Those dlink bastards are going to pay large, let me tell you. They'll be the first against the wall when the revolution comes.

And by revolution I mean when my psychadelic mind control dandelions seize control of the entire planet. I'm president of the world, motherfuckers! And tacos rule. As george bush as protrayed in Robot Chicken would say. Which is an awesome show which everyone should watch to the exclusion of all other activities, including blogging. So log off right now and go watch it.